My life, as it is, seems to be in a huge mess. I’ve got about 2 more months of holidays left, and I have nothing to do other than slack and meet friends. The frequency of which I go out is too low to take up all my time, and hence I spend time programming in php and configuring my own site.
To be honest, the ambition and zeal for the project is dying out. However, somehow or another I feel much better today when I worked on the project and re-created a few pages and scripts. Perhaps I will find the energy to continue the immensely huge project again, alone.
I’ve also been disappointed with friends blabla. It’s not the first time I feel disappointed with friends. Perhaps I have this expectation of how friends should be like deep inside, but genuinely it doesn’t happen, and I need to learn and remember it.
Take for example Saturday’s IPPT. I was very disappointed when my supposedly good NS friend actually booked a different venue when we had agreed to go to the same venue to take the test. I booked Maju and he booked Bedok. I remember very clearly that I smsed him to say I will take the morning slot at Maju. Perhaps he deleted the message and forgotten about it until it was time to book. Then he assumed that I booked Bedok.
That’s the first disappointment, booking a different venue and realizing it the night before. The next disappointment was that he actually asked another of his own friend along with him to go to Bedok Camp. Hence, it doesn’t affect him at all because one way or another he will have someone to attend the IPPT together, someone to talk to during the whole boring routine. Whilst I just have his apologies and nothing else. Cruel long IPPT alone. I don’t know. Perhaps to me I will inform him if I have a friend who is joining us, especially when he do not know my friend. At least I thought it was basic courtesy, since there is an initial appointment. Perhaps it was not basic courtesy, it’s just that I have too high an expectation.
Everywhere it’s like this. I thought friends should be like this, like that, but it turned out differently. I don’t know, perhaps I should realign my friend priority list.