Quiet, throbbing burst of anger

This quiet, slowly gaining pulse of anger grew, and it grew steadily and exponentially until it exploded in a myriad of various colours, enough to keep any spectator in awe. It is so colourful that it was beautiful, and by colourful, I meant in a vulgarities kind of way, the colour being anger streams coming out of a long buried source.

In this semester, I took 6 modules, 25MCs in total, enough to make any average undergraduate feel that life is lousy and that life is extremely stressful. Not to mention there were 5 modules with projects, meaning there was 5 project in total in a semester. Of which the weightage in order of descending magnitude is 100%, 30%, 30%, 25%, 25%. Enough to make anyone feel burdened. Enough to burn your weekends trying to make things work and get reports out.

And it feel really rotten when you get rotten group mates. But before that, let me do a small tribute to my All-Star team, comprising of Tai Man, Nelson and Feng Fu. The 3 of them accompanied me through my EE2001 (100%) project. Taiman and Feng Fu through my EG2401 (25%) essay project + presentation. Feng Fu with me through EE2007 mini and major projects (25%++). Feng Fu accompanying me whilst doing our own design projects (individual) (30%).

Why is this an all star team? This is because there was no need for any instruction. Nobody needed to be scolded or directed to do work. If there is work, it get’s done. Nobody leech off one another. For example, I was pleasantly surprised this morning when Feng Fu came to email us about the documentation for the EE2001 project, and he took a few tasks to do. I then shaved some off the list for myself, and the rest I let Taiman and Nelson settle since they were familiar with the other parts. This team does not need frequent meetings to decide what to do. This team does not need prompting. This team get things done, and put in effort to make sure things get done, and done well too. Hence I am very fortunate that I managed to gather this All-Star team since last semester, and it is my loss that Feng Fu would not be joining us for the EE3001 project next semester since his iLead program will allow him to map it to EE3001.

Now back to the anger, which is streaming of all languages, such a multiracial anger, with hokkien and english coming out occasionally. And all vulgarities cannot sooth my anger. Why is it that in a semester, I experience the best team I could possibly have, and also the worst team I have experienced in my entire life?

I have freeloaders in my team. Freeloaders who don’t do work. Who slack and wait for things to happen. Even when I have 5 projects and this is the project I am least concerned with because I will s/u it the moment it is not an A. Meaning high chance I’ll s/u. I’m taking this module out of interest. Hence I don’t appreciate it when I do most of the work. And it makes things worst when people still arrow you LIKE you never did anything. Totally pisses me off. I did so much work and even the handing up, they want to arrow me to do it. I’m very pissed off. I wrote the freeloader form and printed it. I will hand it up with the report. I guess I’m going to pay for the printing + binding too. Stupid assholes.

Now I just hope to get this over with. I want no more to do with them. Not with people who can’t prove themselves.

Waikit said something which I will adopt it here. I can’t see why I won’t get a 5/5 on a peer evaluation for any project. In my opinion, I did equal, if not more work in any of my projects. I try to do more because I will feel guilty not putting the same amount of effort as my team mates. I don’t like to burden them with unnecessary work.

But I guess not everyone has the same passion and convictions as I do. Time to form my new all star team for next semester.

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