Recently, I tried engaging someone online. The engagement started because I got reminded of how I should change one person at a go (starting from myself), if I want to shape the world. The person posted a long analogy online which is actually a pessimistic analogy of what is happening in Singapore, with the minimum sum increment, foreigners living in our midst and new Integrated Resorts (read: Casinos). The writer ended with “Are my children happy?”, which in the non-analogy world (actual world), is “Are Singaporeans Happy”.

To me, nobody could answer this question outright as a yes or no. Just think about it, if I change the question as “Are Singaporeans Vegetarians”, could anyone answer it with a yes or no? The answers could be “No, not ALL Singaporeans are vegetarians”, or “Some Singaporeans are vegetarians”. Similarly, we cannot generalise and say that Singaporeans are happy/unhappy. There are happy people and there are unhappy people both living on this island.

Next, I thought the question was weird when he kept insisting that I commit to a yes/no answer. I thought it was masking the issue. The issue should be why are some Singaporeans unhappy and not giving him what he wanted: “Yes Singaporeans are unhappy”. The conversation ended amicably with my offer to take it privately as a discussion, but I thought I should write my opinion down.

I find that happiness is from within. People who are rich can be happy, or unhappy. People who are poor can be happy, or unhappy too. Happiness has nothing to do with wealth, social status, your ability to buy a car etc. Happiness is something that everyone can have, even in the face of great difficulty and a tough life.

I mentioned this in the previous post but I have to reiterate. This has to do with how you are living your life, “at effect” or “at cause”. Do you blame yourself or the system for your individual failures? People who are interested and want to take a step forward in your life can start reading books on Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP). Or you can just leave a comment and we can discuss. But if we live life “at effect”, we blame everyone else but ourself and it feels bad because when others are at fault, we feel powerless to change things. We feel vulnerable. We feel unhappy about the situation. But when you blame yourself and you find out what went wrong, we can change things the next time and that is hope. There is positivity and we have a chance for something better. Notice how up-lifting the mood then becomes?

In life we always have a choice in our circumstance.

One thought on “Happiness

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