Feeling Appreciated through a Farewell Dinner

Today, I went for a farewell dinner that was arranged to bid farewell to a few personnel who had left the unit and taken up other positions within the company. It was a little overdue for me as I had left seven months ago. A few years ago, I was the one who arranged for such farewell sessions, and being me, I was looking forward to my turn at the receiving end.

At the end of the dinner, I received my token of appreciation – a nice frame with kind words written by my colleagues in the department. I made a small speech which I had tried to prepare, but the result was miserable as I had not remembered the exact words which I wanted to say. I got nervous and the words came out badly.

Thinking back, I am indeed fortunate to have had supportive bosses. When I was a new person in the department, my first boss helped identify key tasking for me to gain exposure to. It has build me up significantly and I received guidance from him. He has also planned my career for me, encouraging me to take up tasks that would build my career.

I also had the opportunity to spearhead reliability engineering in my unit. I didn’t manage to articulate this in my speech as I wasn’t concentrating very well, but it has piqued my interest in the topic. Currently, I am looking to pursue two reliability-related courses, one from the Singapore Quality Institute and the other from UniSIM. Hopefully both courses give me sufficient knowledge to bring to the unit when I return in the future.

All in all, the farewell dinner gave me much to think about. I am grateful for all the assistance and kindness that people have shown me over the years, and as I reflect, I should strive to nurture the next generation.

Over-estimating Myself

Just a couple of days ago, I attended the Change of Command parade for my previous grand boss whom I worked with for about two years. A few days before the parade, he casually mentioned that my name would be included in the farewell speech. That made me really excited about what is going to happen, and I thought about what I could possibly be recognised for. I was so looking forward to the speech that I had listened intently for the entire duration, only to discover that my grand boss had honoured everyone by listing their names.

Of course, there were a few at the higher levels who deserved special mention and had more air time. As for me, I am just one of the many names, with no examples of my contribution. I was disappointed, yes, but this also gave me some time to do self reflection. I might have over-estimated myself in terms of my contributions. Perhaps they were just minuscule and I thought they were impactful. Perhaps I could really do more and make a difference.

My closer friends knew what was on my mind when they realised that I was just a name among the many. I was sad, especially when the name was mentioned together with personnel whom I thought was undeserving. But hey, who was I to say as that was not my speech. Thinking deeper, I also realised the implications of not mentioning specific individuals when one already mentioned the names of everyone else. Then I understood, it has to be done this way.

But I need to relook at how I am contributing in my workplace and do even better; and prepare for my next role back in the units.

While talking about something that made me feel down, I should also add that there were “up” moments as well. After the parade, we had dinner and I spoke to my former colleagues. There were two specific moments where I felt that I was appreciated and I had achieved something good. First, my guys seemed really happy at the thought that I could one day return as their OC, even those who I did not think I had impacted them as much. It was very touching and motivating. Second, my encik introduced me to two new personnel in the flight, and one of them expressed interest in becoming an officer. My encik introduced me as “you should feel sad that you didn’t have a chance to work under him before he was posted out”. That made me feel very appreciated and that my little efforts to nurture everyone was on a good track. I also felt excited over the possibility of influencing someone positively to become a good officer in future. I only hope that one day I will have a chance to be his mentor.

The New Year

And so this is another of the typical new year posts that people do, except that instead of doing it in the new year, it is done four days into the new year. Anyway this is done as a means to reflect back on the year that had past and is not meant to be entertaining.

First things first. At the start of every year, I do some resolutions and it is time to see how spectacularly I have failed. And after typing this, I realised that one of the reason I probably failed that badly was because I didn’t articulate my resolutions properly in 2015. I had done so in 2014, and even did a review in Dec 14 where I mentioned how I will review my mindmaps and set out my goals. Only that I didn’t get down to it.

One of the resolutions I had, but did not express, was to continue my one book a month reading stint. I was reminded of it when I accessed my Facebook today and noticed how friends were quoting that Mark Zuckerberg reads two books a month. In 2014, I was half as efficient as him. In 2015, I should expect to have improved right? Wrong. I was not motivated and I only accomplished half. That’s six books and here they are:

Jan: Value Investing for Dividend Growth

Feb: Common Stocks, Uncommon Profits

Mar: The Art of Thinking Clearly by Rolf Dobelli

Jun: Edward De Bono’s Six Thinking hats

Jul: The Power Of Forgetting by Mike Byster with Kristin Loberg

Dec: Drive: The surprising truth of what motivates us by Daniel H. Pink

However this doesn’t mean that I only bought or borrowed six books this year. I have had some books on hold for some time, for example, The Fifth Discipline (bought way back many years ago), a Technical Analysis Book, The Intelligent Investor, International Reits and also Mr George Yeo’s collection of speeches. I just didn’t get down to reading as much. Even the book in December was read because I wanted to read it to use it for an essay. This has to change, and to get reading back into a habit, I should start small. I will read 20 minutes a day before I sleep. This should be easy in January as I have to continue researching for my essay.

Next, it finally hit me that my tummy is too disgustingly big and that it has reached a point of no return. Except that this has to return where it came from and I’m not going to carry it for life. To improve on my fitness, I will do sit ups and push ups daily.

In 2015, I received many opportunities at work. I continued to be an effective manager, and carried on my work on reliability. I went on a working overseas trip, and also participated in a study team to look into operational training at my workplace. I was also posted out of my workplace into a new environment which I am trying to adapt and become efficient. To be honest, it wasn’t easy and I am rather stressed out and apprehensive of the work.

So for 2016, I need to be positive and to look at each challenge optimistically. To just do my best and not have any regrets. To this end, I will:

  1. Take on opportunities along the way with a smile
  2. Do daily reflections of what went well and what didn’t
  3. Do weekly reflections on the projects that I am handling (which I did do for a while until I got posted to my new workplace)

For investments, my portfolio did well, but only because the value of USD went up significantly in 2015. Hence even though the value of my portfolio dropped, the overall SGD value increased. However this is not sustainable, so I better continue to read The Edge magazines and to do my read up on companies.

I guess I should end here. The longer the list, the tougher and less fun it gets and the harder it is to make it a good habit to adopt for new year resolutions.

I hope I will remember to periodically do my reviews so that I will be able to end 2016 saying that I met most of my resolutions.

A new direction for the blog

I had wanted to set a new direction for my blog today. The focus was on issues like enhancing productivity, leadership, management etc. These are opinions from me which I would like to share as a means of self reflection and giving others a second opinion. I thought this would be a good way which I could type my feelings and then share the link with some colleagues whom I thought could benefit.

Hence I began trying to filter off certain posts that I have written in the past which might not have been rather objective or pleasant. I was surprised though, that from 2011 till now, I did not write any posts which I would be embarrassed of that needs to be hidden. Perhaps this is a reflection of the realities of life; once I had started working, some things become too minor to be written on the blog, and as such the things that I write are things that I hold dearly and find meaning in.

I didn’t continue filtering the older portions of my blog as they would serve as a reflection of who I was before and how much I have grown since then. I might have changed my mind on many topics that I had written, and I should be judged by who I am now, not who I was in the past. Hence for those who are reading my blog, please take that into consideration and judge me by the content I am contributing now.

I started a Facebook Page in Aug 2014 titled “Productivity at Work – PAW“.I had not been very active on it, but I had shared a few articles which I thought were meaningful. If you are interested in the topics such as productivity, leadership, management, quality management etc, please do give it a like to follow it. Currently I have a single follower but I have no idea who this person is; pathetic, I know.

So here is to a new beginning and a new direction for this blog. May I be able to build a community of people who would help to share and generate ideas for the betterment of one another.

Ask not how the prospects are, aim to have a curtain call without regrets

不问前程如何 但求落幕无悔

This quote stuck with me since I watched “The Empress of China” a few weeks ago. The title of my post is literally the translation of the quote above. I thought it was quite meaningful and it reflects the continuing theme of the drama series very well as the female lead strives to lead a life that does not defy her morals or values even when the prospects might look dim.

The quote holds real life lessons for us as well. How many of us are living our lives based on who we are? Instead most of us are worried about prospects and work to please so that our future is bright. Yet when we ask ourselves, when the curtain calls, would we have lived a life full of regrets?

That got me thinking. I am rather fortunate to be able to find a job that holds meaning for me, and I try to live my life based on what I think is right. Keeping myself to my values and trying not to lose sight of myself. Doing the things that I think matter and trying to maximise my influence so people follow.

While my job aspect has been rather pleasing, I cannot say the same for the other aspects. Indeed there were things that I wanted to do but I procrastinate, and I ended up wasting plenty of time elsewhere when I should be doing other stuff. These undone tasks would indeed be my life’s regret if I continue.

So, do what you want to do, because you only live once? But I think the chinese poetic quote sounds so much better than yolo. Just saying.